Anger is a natural emotion that is meant to alert and energize us in harmful situations. Like any flame, anger can quickly rage out of control and become an anti-social and destructive force. Our Anger Monster responses are learned behaviors. We can change them by reprogramming our brain. We learn to notice what triggers our anger by tracking. And we learn to tame the anger by using Reducers to calm our stress response.
This anger tracking form is a tool you can use to track what makes you angry and how you respond. Evaluate yourself at the end of each day for at least a month to establish new patterns of awareness and improved responses to stress and anger. It works.
Example words and phrases to cool your “hot thoughts:”
• Cool thoughts: “Just stay cool.” “It’s not worth it.”
• Problem-solving thoughts: “How can I solve this peacefully?”
• Questioning your motives: “Why am I getting angry? What’s behind this?”
• Control and escape thoughts: “I can walk away.” “It’s okay to take a time out.”
• Forward-looking thoughts: “What will happen if I let myself get angry?”
• Self-rewarding thoughts: “Good! I’m not yelling, I’m staying calm.”
Write your response. Analyze anger out-bursts by answering these questions:
• How did I do? Was I aggressive, passive-aggressive, or assertive?
• Did I react to any faulty assumptions on how I “thought” people should act?
• Were my “grievances” real or imagined?
• Did selfishness or jealousy kindle my anger?
• What “hot thoughts” fed my anger?
• What were the consequences?
• Do I value the power of a peacemaker?
• What can I do different/better next time to get a better outcome?
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